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Monday 4 February 2013

Smashed.

Three of my children went back to full time school today. I thought I'd managed to survive the seven long weeks of school holidays.....until yesterday. When the five year old, in the course of being harangued into tidying up his room, managed by a sleight of hand to completely decimate my bedroom mantelpiece....with a retractable tape measure, of all things. 

Before:



After:



See that teacup on the left of the 'before' photo, that once belonged to my grandmother who was an inveterate teacup collector....she even had a specially designed display case to show it off. One day my sister and our cousins were allowed to choose a cup that she was going to give us to remember her by when she died. That was that cup I chose. Notice it's absence in the 'after' photo....it was smashed to smithereens.

Look at how the butterflies fared:



I'm afraid that this incident pushed me over the edge into catatonic meltdown territory. I may have been just a tad tetchy beforehand as my husband was heading for Mebourne first thing and I was going to be saddled with the dressed/short order cooked breakfast routine/lunches/hair and bags packed rigamarole.....single handedly. Usually, when he's participating, it's at this point that I wave them all off still in my bathrobe to hang out the washing/do the dishes and get the baby and self dressed in time to get to Bikram Yoga. No, no, no, think again, it was going to be the first day of school.....so in addition to all of this I was pensive because I knew that I was also going to have to make myself presentable to front up to each of their respective classrooms. For me, this is always the hardest part of the exercise.....I may have been guilty one day last year of doing the school run.....in my bathrobe.  

So I was just a tad agitated and was also workshopping a special 'last night of the hols' dinner menu.....that everyone in the family would eat....and thinking about the stressy subject of what I was going to pack in their lunch boxes....which is extra specially difficult as I have declared a moratorium on pre packaged kiddy muck....everything has to be made lovingly by me.....yet I've eased off somewhat as it no longer has to be grown by me.....I know my limits. Or maybe I don't. Needless to say the china/butterfly carnage which ensued pushed me over the edge. With four children I am well and truly outnumbered. With the numbers so firmly stacked against me I don't stand a chance. Over the course of the holidays I became consumed by my children and lost sight of myself. To the constant cry of 'What are we doing today' I became further and further adrift. Admittedly, on occasion I did drag them all kicking and screaming to the childminding at my Bikram Yoga Studio.....yet it obviously wasn't enough. 

Now that three of them are back in the classroom and the baby is asleep.....and I finally have the luxury of some time to myself....I've been trying to reconcile my reaction to yesterday. I've been thinking of all of the good times that we shared over the holidays....when my eldest daughter participated in a yoga class with me.....seeing the mindblowingly superb movie adaption of 'The Hobbit' which had been read to them aloud by their father last year and all of the conversation that engendered.....laughing at the amusing new games invented and the costumes that accompanied them.....watching my almost ten year old master the art of the unicycle and the sense of confidence that it gave him....and listening to the five year old work through all of his old favourite picture books and tell his baby sister the stories.

Better hurry as it's time to get down and pick the little darlings up.....I've missed them!

Rx


20 comments:

  1. Heartbreaking!
    I am so sorry about the smashed tea cup and butterflies!
    I can completely understand your reaction.
    And the subsequent missing of the very children you would have gladly given away just after the incident!

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    1. The teacup was such was such a special connection to my grandmother....it had survived numerous share houses, the move from Sydney to Hobart and even my father in law's 90th birthday afternoon tea. Is it wrong to want to give them away.....wish I was a better mother! Rx

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  2. Oh goodness. I would have gone absolutely troppo over that as well. I am always telling them to stop playing with my tape measure - those things are dangerous, not just for the destruction that you had, but they can take out an eye, or catch a wayward finger pretty easily too. For some reason, they're like moths to the flame (probably because mine is fluoro orange) and I am constantly trying to find it when I need it, or stop them from poking someone in the eye with it. Any chance the teacup can be repaired? Or did it land on the hearth? The thing that I always find hard is that there is no where in the house that is seemingly off limits with children- you would think that those items should be safe up on your bedroom mantle. Sometimes it would be nice to have at least one place they don't destroy!
    You certainly set a much higher standard than I on the lunch box. I do a rubbish free box, and it's all home made, but it generally consists of a fairly boring sandwich, a banana or apple and either a piece of cake/ cheese and crackers/ biscuits/ dip and carrot sticks/combo of both. Some weeks it's the same every day. They don't seem to care much either way.
    Enjoy the peace. I remember reading somewhere that "there is no love deeper than a mother's love when all the children are sound asleep in bed"! xx

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    1. I'd thought our bedroom was the safe place which was why I went to town with all the really precious bits and pieces. Think it is important to try and train children to live with beautiful/fragile things yet have obviously failed abysmally.....no to be honest they are usually really very good....my mother in law used to have everything moved out of their reach as the children were walking in the door....the number of monumental catastrophes have been minimal.....yesterday was the ultimate exception.
      Wish my children were more easygoing about their packed lunches.....they long for white bread and tiny teddies!
      Its 9.15pm and I wish they were all asleep.....can still hear the 2 year old chatting....peace?! Rx

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    2. I do the same - try to teach them to be respectful of the furniture etc....to a point where E has announced that the ugly stool in her bedroom is her "antique" and that we have to be careful with it (ugly stool is its official title. My grandfather carved it and no one else in the family wanted it). Mine love white bread too. I'm completely mean because it's wholemeal. And they tried to tell me that tiny teddies were healthy. Seemed to think I'd fall for it! xx

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  3. I would have gone ballistic about the mantle also! Sometimes it is just the last straw. My tape measure is often played with as well. I have a nanny floral number because every boring one I bought got taken by The Farmer and wound up down the shed. Strangely enough no-one nicks the floral one. Those poor beautiful butterflies all smashed - can that be rebuilt? And the cups was so gorgeous :(

    First day back at school here too. Amazing how much I got done in one morning on my own. And how the house stayed tidy and quiet. My first year with both at full time school. I am only working 2 and a 1/2 days a week too so not sure what I will do with the rest of the time yet (probably the garden and all the other jobs that I should do....)

    Hope those butterflies can be resurrected in some way.

    T
    xx


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    1. A floral tape measure you say? Don't think I can salvage the butterflies, they are like paper and now a mishmash of poor little broken butterfly body parts...wings...antennas....bodies....legs....am now questioning why I get so excited about collecting dead insects.
      My first year with three at full time school...going to be three more years before finally have all four there....in the meantime seriously thinking I need a job....other than the full time one I have at home! Rx

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  4. I feel so sorry for you re the tea cup and butterflies!!! Awful. I would have gone berserk too.

    Last year kindy gave the baby breakfast. This year I have to feed him 1st. Such a small thing but SO HARD when I am rushing to get him there and then rush to the frigging bus to get to work.

    It's the bus that does me in. With a carpark I like to think I'd be unstoppable.

    The broken butterflies hurt my heart xxxx

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    1. Awful. Mine too. Feeding small children is obscene form of torture...can see why it would tip you over the edge.....feel I'm on the brink every morning when do breakfast service in my house. One good thing about living in Hobart is distances are so short and you can usually get a park right out the front of your ultimate destination...relying on a bus would totally break me. Rx

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  5. Oh Romy, the tea cup!!! I feel like crying for you. I would be absolutely devastated too and I'm sure my kids would run and hide fearing the kind of meltdown that would have proceeded such an incident. I am very much looking forward to the Kids going back to school tomorrow - the house looks like a bomb has hit it! Mel xx

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    1. They have been calm and considerate charm personified today....except for when we momentarily couldn't find a rogue school shoe. Good luck with tomorrow morning and enjoy the respite with your little chap! Rx

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  6. It's so hard not to lose yourself in the holidays. A week or two of solid bikram should help surely?! I went to the dreaded Chadstone last week and it was full of mothers shopping solo no doubt trying to re-find their happy place. My happy place is so not Chaddy... gives me a headache!

    I would have sobbed at the carnage of the butterflies and tea cups. Sometimes when special things like that get broken it matters so much more than it should - and simply telling yourself that it's only stuff doesn't help one bit! Your son will probably never forget it - I can still remember smashing mum's treasured glass blown lantern !

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    1. Broke out the Bikram this morning which did wonders....mind/body alignment was exactly what I was missing over the hols. Counting the days until Saturday when I go to Melbourne to do a workshop with Bikram's wife....how can an infernally hot torture chamber be my happy place....if only it were as simple as solo shopping! Rx

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  7. I feel your pain! They are only things after all but I have been known to have a similar reaction to something precious, with great memories attached, being broken x

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  8. Memories are so hard to let go.....especially those that deal with people you've loved who your children have never met. It was just a teacup at the end of the day yet it was infused with qualities which made it more than that...for me. Never mind, this prompted an extensive monologue about the grandmother in question and even though my little boy smashed a tenuous link to the past I hope that he now knows much more about her. Rx

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  9. This is bringing back traumatic memories. Maybe I shall reconsider the adoption situation. Kx

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  10. Romy, my heart hurts for you... Although these things happen, it is so very hard. I hope you can rebuild your mantle with other lovely and loved items to help lessen the hurt of looking at the empty spots. I know the teacup isn't replaceable, but maybe you can find a similar one somewhere, just to have a tangible, physical reminder of its predecessor? If not, may I suggest some lovely rocks, perhaps collected by the little tornadoes themselves? Only a "no throwing" rule must be instated for the sake of the windows...

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  11. I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother's tea cup, and those beautiful butterflies. Both broke my heart. Especially anything belonging to your beloved grandmother being inadvertently destroyed... (Although I did have a smile at the "grow-your-own-school lunches" line. And the bathrobe school-run is hilarious. I think we all do The Housecoat Call occasionally.

    I had a tantrum this morning too. It's my birthday but hubster came in at 6AM (I'd only made it to bed at 3AM after working all night), dumped some gifts down (which I had bought for him to give me), and said "We have to be quick opening these as I have some emails to do before I go to work!" (The last 2 birthday dinners he's forgotten his wallet, so clearly it's not an important occasion.) I think I might need some bikram yoga today too? Heading up to Sydney instead. That might be good therapy.

    Hope the week gets better for you Miss R! XX

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  12. Oh no. The heartbreak of the tea cup. I would have gone completely berserk as well. Nicholas aged 3 opened up my special china cabinet carefully selected out the one piece that was of most significance (a dear friend gave it to me) and was probably the most difficult to replace (rare Carlton Ware platter) turned and looked at me and dropped it on the floor. I have never forgotten the look on his face as he did it. He will probably never forget the wrath of Mummy that quickly followed. Nevertheless, to this day I still have all my beautiful and easily breakable items out and accessible.

    Also, I would so love if you shared more of your lunch box recipe favourites with us. I also have this thing about making everything myself (haven't tried to grow it though! Totally impressed with that!!) and am always looking for ideas. Emma xx

    PS. Love your Ganesha.

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  13. Oh what a horrid tale, my friend. I feel your anguish. What a beastly shame. Want to head to Gowan's to hunt down some more butterflies? J x

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I LOVE hearing your thoughts! Rx